When I first heard the word stereotactic, I thought, "stereo what?" It is the radiologist's word for fancy equipment. Digital imaging, I think is layman's terms. Today I got to experience the fancy shmancy equipment first hand. I went to have a "stereotactic biopsy" of my right breast. No big one, so no sweat. Ah, I just realized what that sounds like and that, for those who know me, the no big one may be confused with my boob. What I actually meant was that the procedure was no big one. And come to think of it, neither is my boob. Anyway, they lay you on a table that has a hole in it. Your boob goes thru the hole and they raise the table overhead and they do the biopsy from underneath you.
I came prepared. I wanted to make sure I didn't lose any more boob tissue than I had to so I labeled my boobs...Left one says "not me" and the right one says "me". When I got all robed up, they came in to discuss the procedure with me. They said they had to "mark" the breast beforehand. I opened my gown and the lady nearly fell flat laughing. When I was dressing this morning I figured they might need a laugh this morning and so that I didn't take unnecessary risk in losing one mm more than I had to (afterall, they ARE small and perhaps one mm might matter) I marked them. She asked if she could bring someone in to see and after ensuring it wasn't a man, I agreed. She brought another nurse in and asked me to open my gown, I happily agreed. She laughed so hard and said she would love to take a picture to keep. We all laughed and decided that the picture might land us in jail, so we declined the photo op.
While I was waiting in the room to have the procedure done, I was looking at that table with the hole in it. All I could think of was that the hole was the size of a soccer ball. "I might fall through that hole" I thought. Four of my boobs could fit in there. I pondered all the possibilities from falling through the hole to having boobs that big. Ok, so I can dream, can't I? When the radiologist came in, I told her what my mind had been thinking and she told me that she has actually had to "squeeze" a few boobs through the hole - man, that just isn't right. NO ONE should have boobs that big.
They did the procedure - not a big deal. They take a hollow needle and insert it to the desired location and while under the skin, the needle does a clockwise circle taking tissue samples from 360 degrees and they do that twice, totalling 24 samples. Then they place a titanium marker in. When you are done, they do a compression wrapping and give you a, how shall I say it...less than attractive compression bra that needs to remain on for 48 hours. Of course, they give you post-procedure rules....no water for 24 hours, no baths for 3 days, ice packs for 2 days and after that, head for up to one month, bruising, swelling (see, there IS an advantage to this procedure and seeing it from the swelling point of view, I was wishing they had done both my boobs) and no sexual activity for 3 days...not that I even thought about it. The nurses were funny. They said that they tell all their patients, "get naked, except for that granny compression bra you are wearing, and go to bed with just that. It will ensure your husband will NOT want to have sex for at leaast the next 3 days".
All in all, it was fine. We all had some good laughs and I am now back in the comfort of my own home...one big boob smashed under this compression wrap, getting bigger (and more sore) by the minute. I have a green light to do nothing for 48 hours. In fact, I am not allowed to do anything that required a brain wave for that long. I wonder why all the rules and assume it is all safety...CYA I think it is called. (cover your a..)
So, now I go back to playing the waiting game. I am at this point, a champion player. Results by Monday morning. Don't you have to wonder why not Friday morning....just tack on that extra 2 days. Probably more CYA. Just in case. I would guess I will know by the end of the week, but "just in case" they say Monday. My only one concern is that the marker is so deep that they cannot even see it with a traditional mammography view. The location is in the muscle that literally covers the chest bone. If it should be something, it is a little too close to bone for my comfort, but I am going with it is still nothing until it is something.
Until next time...
