OK, came by at 4:30 this morning and thought I should write...nah. Maybe I will just go read my bible...so I did. Waited for Sharon to call for our daily prayer at 6 am but no call. Today is a holiday (I think) and kids are home from school, so good call on Sharon's part. Fell asleep at 6:30 and just woke up. My friend, Kelly, took 2 of her 3 children skiing...Gab is here with us. I envy that Kelly. Always a doer...me...I'm a non-doer, sliding thru life on Eric and Sharon's coat tails. Kelly's husband, Timm, travels a bit for work and sometimes is gone 2-3 weeks at a time. They have a large dog (which you could literally saddle and ride) named Rohan...just by that name you KNOW he requires a great deal of attention, food and of course, walking because his bladder holds about 6 quarts of water. Combine that with owning a horse, riding lessons, shows, ballet and piano lessons, hockey and football (which are both grueling schedules), soccer, and maybe even a little tennis. GO, GO, GO! Man o man...I don't know how she does it, and she does it ALL! Shoveling, spreading mulch, leaves, car maintenance, oil changes, paying bills, taxi driving, cooking and laundry and the list goes on and on...oh, I forgot, she also teaches Spanish. Ok, so you all wanted to know a super mom...well, here she is. The amazing thing is that she would deny it and most likely say she was none of that (she really is all of that). So, today when she could be sitting by a fire, reading a nice book, relaxing and sleeping in, she decides she will take her kids skiing on their day off...as for me, mine are still in their jammies (me, too - you already know how much I love jammies) sitting around with me...doing not much of anything. How in earth did I get from passport to purity to Kelly? See...A.D.D...gee, how did France get so far away and why is chocolate not listed as a major food group and oh, I have something in the oven (see - party in my head all the time).
Back to basics...Passport to Purity. It is a 5 week session that our youth group is doing for our middle school. At first, it sounded pretty good to me, I mean, who doesn't want their youth to be pure?! Surely, we ALL want God's plan for our children, don't we? I can definitively say one thing for sure...I DO NOT want my children gallopping down that trail filled with dirt and dust that I ran down! So, passport to purity sounded pretty good to me. Until this morning.
Eric went to the mandatory parent meeting last night to discuss the plan...what would they cover and to what extent, blah blah blah. So, in my excitement this morning, I went right to Eric..."Did they give you any written information about the group?". "Yeah, they did"...."can I have it, can I have it"...now for anyone who may read this and not really know me well, I can be (OK, I AM) driven by emotion, sometimes rattling Eric's cage a bit. I could see the anxst in him...he is a dead giveaway...reddening face, an ever-so-minor tilt back and sometimes even a roll or two of the eyes. "here, but wait, I want to tell you two things..." Now, this caught my attention. Usually he would be happy to part with any piece of paper I was willing to take on and deal with, but his holding on made me a bit nervous..."What?" "They will discuss intercourse and masturbation"...WHAT !?*#?*&@ Can you even imagine my thoughts...they race without ANY input from anyone else and now they were at a break neck pace heading for the final stretch in what would prove to a race to the finish...only the race was between Eric and myself. UGH. I just wish I could turn that off once it rears it's ugly head...but I just dive right in (to my own emotions, that is). So, there I went, right down that emotional trail and got so dirty that I could barely see. "No, I am not OK with sending her....She is only 12...I already talk to her about all these things....DATING! Are you kidding me, she is 12!...limits...how far should you go - Here, let me tell you...NOT FAR AT ALL...as a matter of fact, she will never leave this house - that's how far she should go" and on and on I went...just to be face to face with Eric's rationale - "I think you should talk to Mary and Shawn DeMoss (youth pastor and his wife)". Dang! Knocked me right off my horse! "But, I don't need to talk to them...what is to talk about...". So you can now picture the scene...me on my high horse and Eric waiting for my storm to subside. And, eventually it did. I took the paper upstairs, prayed a bit and read my Bible. And, can you believe it! God agreed with me (He usually does - NOT). But I really feel like in this matter, He is OK with me not sending her. Now, this is not the norm. See, I always have some plan...some plan of attack...some thing that I think should go down a certain way. Sure, I pray about it...sure, I hear God...sure I want to be obedient and many times, in my selfishness, I go about my plan the way I am sure God agreed to just to have His plan be unveiled to me. See, His plans are ALWAYS better than ours. He can see it all and only wants what's best for us. He is our Father. He would NEVER give us something that wasn't best for us. Kind of like us as parents. I would NEVER send Raechyl to something that I did not think was in her best interest. I would never give her something that would hurt her, even if she wailed about it (like the cell phone thing - she wails and pleads and begs, but we feel it isn't in her best interest to have one so we won't cave in). That is the way God operates. We may think we need it, we may want it, we might even try to get it on our own...and maybe He will allow us to get it...but if it isn't part HIs good plan, having it will only lead to repentance. Like us (as parents), He will never reprove us simply to punish. It is ALWAYS AND ONLY to correct us. That is the awesome part of being a child of God. We can be assured that our lives are ALWAYS under His sovereign control and that He will ONLY give us what is right and just (in His plan). See...more A.D.D...from passport to purity to God's saving grace. But in fact, they are ever so related. God only wants what is best for Raechyl (and us), and so do I. Ok, so this passport to purity thing isn't for us....right now. Not never, just not right now. I discussed the entire thing with Raechyl and we are on the same page. So, with all this said, I will go now. I am going to play Farkel with Rae (sounds bad, doesn't it?). Hopefully my next post will be short and not so emotionally driven...but then again, what fun would that be?
